Seriously, this bullshit is out of control. My inbox is stuffed with emails for miracle cures. How do I filter all this nonsense? It's driving me insane.

• My only wish is to get a legitimate email for once.
• Maybe someday this will stop.
• {Until then|{Until that day arrives|I'm resigned to deleting spam all day long.

Spam: The Digital Poop In My Inbox

My inbox feels like a garbage dump/is overflowing with/is choked by spam. It's like someone is dumping/as if an automated bot is relentlessly pouring/throwing/sending digital poop into my virtual mailbox every day. Every time I try to get some work done/check for legitimate emails/enjoy a moment of peace, there it is: another {outrageous offer/unbelievable deal/suspicious message from some random company/person/scheme. It's enough to make me want to throw my computer out the window/delete my email account/scream into the void.

• I swear I didn't sign up for/How did they even get my email address?/Who gave them permission to bombard me with this junk?
• There are so many variations/It's always different/They use every trick in the book!
• Maybe one day I'll find a way to stop it/Someday they'll catch those spammers/Perhaps there's a magic spell for this problem.

I'm So Sick Of Your Fucking Spam Emails

Seriously, way too much is just plain wrong. Every day I get flooded with your lame junk mail for things I don't website even care about. I've tried to unsubscribe, but it's like talking to a closed door. At this point, I'm just mad as hell.

• Stop sending me these emails already.
• Get a clue.
• I'm reporting your ass to the authorities.

Make This Spam Stop You Jerks

Listen up, you bunch of morons. This spam/junk mail/crap needs to cease. I'm fed up with your lame attempts to scam/con/trick me.

You think you're so clever sending me this useless/pointless/worthless junk, but you're just a bunch of losers. I'm going to report/block/slander every single one of your emails/messages/schemes. So Take that as a threat.

• Leave me alone
• Just stop it

Enough is Enough, You Spamming Bastards!

Listen up, you lowlifes! Your annoying emails are clogging up inboxes and pissed off people. We've had enough of your crap. This is your final warning to quit this. Keep sending that drivel, and we'll be forced to take legal action. Understand? Yeah, right.

Seriously With Your Stupid Messages

You think you're so smart, sending out your junk to every irrelevant person you can find. But guess what, fucker? I give a damn for your lies. Get a real job or go outside already.

• Get Lost With Your Annoying Texts
• I have no time
• Get a real job or go outside already.